


Snake King

by Zirakinbar



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Naruto
Genre: Gen, Hogwarts, Parseltongue, Second year, crack!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:13:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25186183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zirakinbar/pseuds/Zirakinbar
Summary: Draco Malfoy accidentally overpowers his summons during duelling club. Manda, King of Serpents, is not amused.
Comments: 16
Kudos: 423





	Snake King

“Serpensortia!” Draco cried with a snarl on his face. There was a billow of smoke – and then it was flooding the room, sending people reeling to the ground. Harry jumped backwards as a shape formed in the fog, growing up and up until it reached the ceiling, coils expanding outward to form a snake like no other.

“ _Sasuke!”_ the snake howled. “ _How dare you summon me again! I’ll rend your flesh from your bones human, I’ll have my children feast on your innards!”_

There were screams, none louder than the one originating from Professor Lockhart. Professor Snape had a whip of fire in his hands in an instant, shouting at Draco, “ _Break your spell now, now you fool boy!”_

He was cut silent as the massive snake snapped its tail around sharply, sending the professor flying into the wall with a dull thud. Harry dropped off the stage, searching desperately for spells that might help. Draco was curled into a ball near the snake whimpering and the students (and Lockhart) stampeded towards the exit.

The snake inhaled and paused. “ _No Sasuke,”_ it hissed softly. “ _I don’t taste that foul scent anywhere. Who dares summon the Great Manda then?”_

Harry cast a look around, but it didn’t seem like anyone was going to answer the snake – and it seemed equally unlikely that anyone would be fighting it. If he could – if he could keep it talking, then maybe Dumbledore could get there in time?

“ _Malfoy_ ,” he hissed, not noticing the words coming out sibilant, “ _Malfoy, you massive prat, tell the damn snake it was an accident!”_

“ _A speaker?”_ Manda said, rearing back in surprise, and then, “ _Are you saying that you did not summon me, speaker?”_

Harry froze. He hadn’t thought this one through. “ _Ah, no,”_ he hissed awkwardly. “ _I’m afraid not – uh, Great Manda?”_ Malfoy was crawling away on his hands and knees now and Harry was tempted to try and knock him over.

“ _And why would you_ not _summon the Great Manda?”_ the snake demanded.

Harry blinked.

“ _Were you – weren’t you just upset that someone_ did _summon you?”_ he asked incredulously.

“ _I am the Great Manda!”_ the snake cried, deciding to ignore the question. “ _I make my enemies flee in despair, I destroy all who stand against me! Are my scales not beautiful, speaker? Are my fangs not fearsome enough for you?”_

 _“I- they’re very fearsome,”_ Harry hissed slowly. “ _And your scales are a lovely purple. Very fetching._ ”

The snake made a little sound that could be interpreted as pleased preening.

“ _I just – I don’t really have many enemies to make flee in despair,”_ Harry explained. “ _I’m twelve, we tend to save the rending and stuff for when we’re adults.”_

 _“I know many a twelve-year-old capable of bringing doom and destruction to all that face them,”_ Manda sniffed a little huffily. “ _It feels like you just aren’t appreciating my magnificence, speaker.”_ The snake swayed its enormous head from side to side. “ _Are you sure that you don’t have any enemies that we could destroy together? Maybe a little one?”_

“ _I – er,”_ Harry said. “ _Well I guess there’s Voldemort, but I killed him last year… Dumbledore said that he split his soul and so his wraith is still hanging around.”_ Harry scratched his head a little. “ _And there’s someone called the Heir of Slytherin who’s been petrifying people around the school who I guess could be an enemy, but I don’t know who that is.”_ He cast a baleful eye around the empty room. “ _That’s about it though.”_

 _“An immortal enemy,”_ Manda hissed thoughtfully. “ _I can set my children to find this wraith of yours and then I can eat his undead remains while you watch, speaker. That would certainly be a wonderful way to mark the start of a partnership, wouldn’t it?”_

Harry shrugged. “ _That- uh, that sounds good to me,”_ he said slowly. Over to the side Professor Snape groaned a little as he struggled back from unconsciousness. “ _Say, you don’t think you’d mind giving him another bash would you? Just enough so he can’t teach for the rest of the year?”_

Manda hissed contentedly as he swung his tail again. “ _I think we can certainly find some ways to work together nicely, young speaker,”_ he said, and Harry found himself agreeing.


End file.
